This always happens. As soon as I begin to prove myself capable of the who writing every day and maintaining a stable word count, I want to do more. Lists of goals, plans, ideas, and all such things flood my brain on a regular interval. It’s the curse of being a creative type. A typically undisciplined creative type at that.
Two of my last posts had as their featured image small post-it notes with drawings on them. It’s another one of those talents I have a pension for yet don’t invest the time into. I want to… badly. Writing has a greater need in my mind.
Autumn is a particularly difficult period of time for my resisting all these creative urges. The cooler weather, falling leaves, the smells, the macabre of Halloween, the togetherness of Thanksgiving, produce a swell of emotions that drive me to want to do everything that I have a creative talent for. Writing and drawing are chief among them.
I am feeling it bad today as I wander around an apple orchard gorging on apples (see my Instagram for some of the photos if you’re curious).
Writing is my focus, however. It is what I really would like to be doing as a career. Not that art and drawing of some kind, like with a webcomic, would also be welcome; it’s just a secondary priority.
And part of me is believing that part of this drive to do everything is in a way a path for my critical voice (the bully in me) to sabotage progress. By trying to do too much, I in effect spread myself too thin. I then begin to see the train derail, eventually cursing my inability to do it all. Who can without first laying all the tracks?
I will eventually get there. I need to slow myself down. Doodle a little when I am feeling the need to draw, to help get the urge down. Major projects though? They should be stopped unless they tie-in directly to work I am already doing.
Little by little I hope to get to a point where I am able to manage all of my creative driven talents in the daily throws of life. Today is not that day.